Wel eens opgevallen dat iedereen die richting Duitsland gaat lyrisch is over de Kebab daar? Bert gaat zelfs een heuse bedevaart in het land van onze Oosterburen houden (zonder gedoogsteun van de SGP trouwens). Dat brengt de vraag naar boven: stimuleert de Duitse taal goede kebab?
Om deze theorie te testen reisde ik spoorslags af naar Oostenrijk. Volgens mijn noodverzameling kebabadressen claimt Baden de beste kebab ter wereld te hebben.
De taxi-chauffeur was niet bemoedigend. In Baden zijn alleen oude mensen. En het grootste casino van Oostenrijk, volgens haar gebouwd volgens het principe het hoeft niet mooi te zijn als het maar groot is.
De KLM had me onderweg als warming-up voorzien van 5 kaaszoutjes en een kop lauwe koffie. Kebab, ik was er klaar voor.
Het plaatsje Baden had beter Bad genoemd kunnen worden, zo klein is het. De bevolking maakt inderdaad gebruikt van stokken, rolstoelen en rollators, maar met dit prachtige weer schijnt niemand er mee te zitten.
Het centrum van Baden zou gedomineerd kunnen worden door de centrale Josephplatz, als ze niet dat lelijke casino hadden. En als Wenen geen rangeerterreintje voor de tram nodig had, waar dat open plein wel aardig voor was.
Toch, in dit centrum van het centrum zijn alle vijf de jongeren en Kebab & Pizza Haus. Ik onderdruk mijn vooroordelen over de pizza/kebab combi en stap binnen. Er blijken 7 jongeren in Baden te zijn. Binnen zitten er nog twee. Er zijn ook twee rollen. Dat lijkt ten minste ergens op.
De kebabber merkt me op. Dat is opmerklijk, want hij heeft zijn hoofd verkeerd om onder zijn petje, en dat moet toch slecht zijn voor de bloedsomloop.
“Kebab Kalb bitte, mit wasser“. “Mit was?” “Wasser?” “Wasser!” “Römerquelle?” “Ja, wasser!”
“Prickelend? ”
Kijk, in deze woest erotische omgeving, waar echte mannen fier achter hun Rollator GTI de zebra blokkeren, lijkt me dat me wel wat. Prikkelend! En dat bij het beste broodje ter wereld.
Het oordeel. Het vloerbroodje is goed, niet perfect, maar goed. Binnen het gras, dat onder het motto “alles” er in wordt geschept, zijn wat subsoorten te onderscheiden, maar het smaakt allemaal even amorf. In het land van de Zwiebelturm verwacht je wat van het ui, maar de smaak daarvan komt niet boven die van de verlepte sla uit.
De saus is verdunde mayonaise. Gewoon shit. Het vlees is wat uitgedroogd. Te lang op de rol. De verdeling klopt redelijk, maar het is gewoon niet zo veel.
De prijs, € 4,20 voor de combi, is ok.
Kortom, het beste broodje ter wereld vind je bij Kebab & Pizza op de Josephplatz. Maar alleen als je wereld de omvang van Baden heeft, en je waarneming wordt vertekend omdat je hoofd verkeerd om onder je petje staat. In deze plaats raad ik je echt een Heuriger aan als je trek hebt. De stelling dat Duits goede kebab stimuleert is niet bewezen.
Kebab & Pizza Haus
Josephplatz 3, Baden, Oostenrijk
https://www.google.nl/maps/place/Kaiser+Franz+Joseph-Ring+3,+2500+Baden,+Oostenrijk/@48.0039176,16.2392032,17z/data=!3m1!4b1!4m2!3m1!1s0x476db0f6465a41bf:0x7956d0d5c1ab0446?hl=nl
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