Mooi, Lowlands dus. Dankzij een bierbrouwer die besloot mij er op de valreep naar toe te sturen. Best aardig, vind je niet? Ik wel. Iets met veel bands, veel mensen, veel plezier, en veel bier, heel veel bier.
Dan is het opeens zaterdagmorgen. Denk je. Want je ligt in je tent, hoofdpijn. Heel erg hoofdpijn. Geen idee meer van wat er gebeurd is. Nog voor je je ogen open durft te doen schrik je wakker van een stem. Vlak naast je. Een meisje. Een meisje?! Shit, denk snel, nu! Een meisje? Je kan je echt helemaal niets meer herinneren. Het meisje draait zich naar je toe en geeft je een kus. Shit, waarom weet ik niets meer?! Wie is dat? “Hebben wij, ehh? Nou ja, ehh? Je-weet-wel?” stotter je voorzichtig, krampachtig proberend je te herinneren wat er gebeurd is. “Ja natuurlijk” antwoord ze. Ja hoor, dat moet jou weer overkomen. “Was het ehh…tja…uhh…goed?” Je moet het gewoon vragen. “Jij was er niet zo over te spreken, ik vond het best lekker hoor” antwoord zij. Om er aan toe te voegen dat je zelfs foto’s hebt gemaakt. Met een rode kop check je je camera, en inderdaad : Een foto van een broodje kebab. Wat dacht jij dan?
Waarom staat er dan een vage foto boven dit stuk? Omdat ik natuurlijk geen meisje in mijn tent aantrof. Het is slechts een verhaaltje dat ik op Lowlands verzon, en wat me grappig leek. Omdat ik, slecht verhaal dit, op de een of andere manier ook niet toe ben gekomen aan het maken van foto’s van de kebab. Omdat de foto die ik van de kebabtent heb gemaakt mislukt is. Te weinig geduld, dus toen de flitser klaar was wees mijn camera niet meer naar de kebabkraam. Tja, dat is Lowlands. Ik had mezelf ernstig voor genomen nog foto’s te gaan maken. Het is er niet meer van gekomen. Ik zei het al : slecht verhaal.
Ik weet het, een mooie foto ter illustratie was een stuk professioneler geweest. Maar wat maakt het uit? Lowlands is voorbij, dus het duurt nog een jaar voor je er weer kebab kan halen, als er dan weer kebab is, je weet maar nooit. Ik mis de everzwijnhammetjes nog steeds. Was de kebab goed? Ja, voor festivalkebab was het goed te doen. Turks brood, een beetje zuur sla mengsel, of wat het dan ook was. Vlees dat in grote snelheid van de 6 (gelijmde) rollen werd gesneden. Gewoon standaard vlees dus. Vrolijke kebabsnijders en als Oosterse buikdanseressen vermomde verkoopsters. Waar ik dus een foto van wou maken, maar ook dat ging niet zo. Mede door het dragen van mijn kebab shirt, iets dat voor veel mensen hilarisch was. Ik, met dat shirt, die foto’s probeerde te maken van de kebabtent. Ik voelde me er een beetje ongemakkelijk bij. Het shirt was trouwens ook nog heel even te verkrijgen op Lowlands.
Twee dagen later was de sla, of wat er voor door moet gaan (ui en nog wat, geloof ik) minder zuur. Nog steeds was het een goed middel tegen honger. Verdeling was belabberd, maar door de hoeveelheden bier maakte me dat dus echt niets uit. De prijs schandalig. 2,5 muntje, wat neerkomt op iets van ruim 6 euro. Een verslag van niets dit, maar het was een leuk feest. Maakt dat broodje kebab dan nog uit? Nee, dat bedoel ik. Kortom : je hebt niets aan dit verslag, geen foto’s, geen tent die je kunt testen. Alsof het uitmaakt. Festivalvoedsel is per definitie te duur. En nooit echt heel goed, het is er om te zorgen dat je door kunt zuipen zonder al te snel omvallen. En dat doet het meestal goed.
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