Om maar gelijk met de figuurlijke deur in huis te vallen : Het was een kut kebab week. Te beginnen op de zondag, toen ik meer dood dan levend een soort van wakker werd, al mag het eigenlijk geen wakker heten. De dag voor zondag, zaterdag dus, een bijzonder gezellige bbq gehad die werd afgesloten met een dansje in de hoofdstedelijke Melkweg. Erg leuk allemaal, maar tevens een garantie voor een zware zondag. En zo geschiedde. Die zondag had ik dus flinke behoefte aan een broodje kebab om de boel weer op gang te brengen. Nou kon ik een heleboel willen op dat moment, de kans dat er ook maar iets van terecht kwam was zeer gering. Ik gaf de algehele wereldvrede een grotere kans van slagen dan dat ik de deur ging verlaten voor een broodje. Dapper een poging gewaagd maar die eindigde vrijwel meteen in mijn bed, waar ik verder een gat in de dag ging slapen, al dromend over vrolijk dansende lammetjes in de wei en zingende sambal flessen. ’s Avonds, het gat in de dag was op wonderlijke wijze weer gemaakt, ging mijn interesse meer uit naar toch weer voorzichtig beginnen met het drinken van bier, en kwam het er weer niet van mijn huis te verlaten.
Maandag werd ik uitermate fris wakker, onmaandags zeg maar. Ha! Dat verdiend heel veel bier en een bbq. Zo gezegd zo gedaan. Geen broodje kebab dus maar het knagende gevoel was er nog steeds. Ik wou graag nog even vermelden dat het weer een erg gezellige bbq was, waarvan akte.
De als maandag vermomde dinsdag kwam zoals ik een maandag gewend ben. Te vroeg, te brak. Een maag die mij vrijwel direct begon duidelijk te maken dat de vrij constante stroom van op kolen gegaard vlees en alcoholische versnaperingen gecompenseerd diende te worden. Omdat ik graag vrienden met mijn maag blijf beloofde ik hem die avond een maaltijd te gaan nuttigen bestaande uit groente en fruit. Mits ik nu dan eindelijk mijn broodje kebab mocht gaan eten. Dat mocht. Ik was in IJmuiden en had daar geen slechte ervaring opgedaan vorige keer dus dat zou hem worden. Helaas konden mijn maag en ik nog zulke goede vrienden zijn, dat was ik nog niet met mijn bankrekening. Een meewarige piep viel mij ten deel, mijn geld was nog niet gestort. Niks kebabontbijt om mij op de been te houden, ik zou tot na lunchtijd moeten wachten, helaas.
Enige uren later was lunchtijd verstreken en stond er wel geld op mijn rekening. Op dat moment bevond ik mij in Hoofddorp, waar ik een heel erg slecht broodje at. Broodje was dusdanig geroosterd dat het na enkele happen doormidden brak, en de kalfskebab smaakte verdacht veel naar kip. Misschien dat ik hier nog eens een stukje aan ga wijden. Of ik gun Bas de twijfelachtige eer hier te eten en dan een heerlijk zeik stuk te schrijven.
Maar goed, lang verhaal kort, het is ondertussen donderdag en ik had nog steeds dringend behoefte aan een lekker broodje kebab. Waarom ik het in godsnaam dan in Zandvoort zocht is mij eigenlijk ook een raadsel, maar je weet maar nooit. Op de passage zit op enkele meters afstand van een eerder beschreven toko nog een kebabtent. Ook hier schijnen ze elkaar graag op te zoeken. De zaak zag er op het eerste gezicht netjes uit. Geen prijslijst helaas. Broodje besteld. Een mooi gewoon broodje ging onder de grill. Alvast afrekenen. Zei de beste man nou 5 euro?! Ehh, ja dus. Ik vermoedde dat ik dus zo mee mocht om het lammetje uit te kiezen dat voor de kebab gebruikt ging worden. Fout! Zou ik er dan soms een glas champagne bij gaan krijgen? Nee hoor, niks van dat. Er werd gewoon echt, zonder blikken of blozen, 5 euro gevraagd. Broodje was niet gevuld genoeg voor 5 euro. Verdeling was geen 5 euro waard. Knoflooksaus was lekker, maar rechtvaardigde geen 5 euro. Had ik een mooi verzadigd gevoel na afloop dat 5 euro waard zou zijn? Verre van. Als het de helft had gekost had hier een positieve ervaring gestaan. Nu dus niet. Waarom kan je in Amsterdam wel voor twee en een halve euro van een goed broodje genieten en moet dat hier 5 euro kosten? Geen flauw idee. Ik weet wel dat ik nog steeds een goed broodje kebab moet eten deze week. Zo kan het niet langer.
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